saying too much on dates

Do you know what y’all young pups’ problem is?

You. Guys. Talk. Too. Much.

Seriously, it is a huge problem nowadays. Do not get me wrong, talking is very essential during male female interactions. Talking removes any feeling of intimidation that your partner may feel; the more obvious pro associated with speaking out is that it enables people to know each other better. But it becomes a problem when you dominate the conversation and start answering questions that you haven’t yet been asked.

Let me gift some of you young bloods with some knowledge: you may think that the process of courting is meant to remain a magical process, where you create a relationship out of a beautiful period of romance; it is not. It is all a game; the game of seduction. Now before all your relationship purists snap at me for attempting to ruin something that is meant to be beautiful, think about these two scenarios.

Suppose two guys approach a lady at a bar. The first guy comes at her and starts throwing all these facts in her face, mostly facts about him. Basically, this guy is trying to sell himself on why she should consider him, and he’s talking on and on, trying to impress her. (I can’t blame the guy, we’re all trying to make a good impression of ourselves to everyone we meet). Thereafter, suppose the same girl is approached by a different guy. Now this guy buys her a drink, asks her questions about herself, engages her in conversation and is only focused on positive body language; not verbal language.

approach at a bar

Who do you think will be more successful? Before you tell me off for calling it a game, think about the above scenario.

I’m not saying that you throw questions at her; she will see through your crap and slack you off like the first guy. Just engage her in conversation; disarm her and make her feel free by saying some stuff about yourself, but focus more on making her talk about herself. And as she does this, engage her in conversation. The most important thing to focus on are your people skills (in order to get along well with the lady), and your body language too; body language is 60% of the attraction stage of an interaction. There is a whole other post on body language that I will do soon.

If you are an introvert and are trying to speak up more, that is fine. If you’re an extrovert, it is fine too; seduction is a game for everyone. But be sure to limit talking about yourself all the time, and never compromise your words over body language.

If you will forget anything else I’ve ever taught you, make sure you at least remember this.