Would you ever allow your partner or bae to have a best friend of the opposite gender? A good number of peeps would say it is not a problem but another group think that it is the worst mistake one can ever make.

A buddy of mine once told me they would never trust a best friend. This is after he found his girl cheating with her ‘supposed to be best friend’. He even undertook his research and found out the affair had been going on for sometime. Sema mwanaume kucheswa!

One thing is can clearly conclude is friendship is something that one cannot deny another. The only thing to watch out for is how close the friendship gets. We are all human beings created by the most high and friendship and companionship are part of life.

Everyone has a past and the problem with some of these experiences is that they are long lasting. Some people develop friendships that are close but never intend to date the person they have the bond with. They may opt to date a different person and also keep the best friend on the side. Reasons being they fear dating their best friend might ruin the relationship. The problem with these kind of bonds they tend to be sexual in nature. I did not say all, 80% of these relationships may be sexual in nature. This is where now trust issues begin to arise from such circumstances.


When trust issues start arising then there will come so many arguments and disagreements. That is where the next problem comes in. Once you argue with your partner and she/he has a best friend then that will be the next place they will run for comfort. If the best friend is a ‘fisi’ and always wanted to prey on your partner, becomes the best time. The will do whatever then come to regret their actions later, which in turn might cause development of feelings between the two of them.

There is hope in cases like these of best friends. First thing one is supposed to do is stop that best friend relationship. To avoid these complication one just has to become their partners best friend. In a relationship you just have to trust each other with everything and create a strong bond that even the best friend will not find part.

Best friends with the opposite sex and one is in a relationship is a no go zone.