Teenage is characterised by a myriad of new experiences and lack of knowledge on how to handle these which inevitably leads to a lot of experimenting. When feelings of attraction toward the opposite sex begin developing, most teens are initially at a loss on what to do. A teen’s mind is a mix of confused emotions and unanswered questions. But that quickly dissolves as time goes by. The feelings become cemented in a teen’s mind and opinions are formed by their peers. They learn that these can be expressed through a mutual union(relationships) and proceed to jump on it.

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Without knowing the truths about relationships and depending on hearsay from pals and the media, they go on about exploring their depths which in turn translates to teenage love affairs. The expectations of these are largely determined by one’s gender, upbringing and peer group. But with all that going, they are a huge load of crap. Don’t get me wrong, I am not in any way undermining their importance as valuable experiences. I am just pointing out that they don’t make much for substance per se.

When sex comes into the picture then, it is a whole different scenario. Teens’ reasons for having sex are varied. For guys, it is mostly peer influence and the need to feel manly while for the girls it is in a bid to please the boyfriend. It usually works like clockwork, each affecting the other. Granted, they are both haunted by sexual desires but girls tend to be in better control of theirs. They are taught since earlier on how having sex will get them pregnant, STD’s and be branded sluts by everybody. On the other hand, sex is glorified among dudes. It elevates one’s status among his buddies and the more partners he has, the more manly he feels.

When teens in a relationship, pressured by the various factors, engage in sex, they have different motives and expectations. The girl naively thinks that it will hold her guy down and enhance the love while for the boy its mission accomplished. They carry on this charade for a while before trouble starts brewing in paradise. The guy has gotten what he wants so he is no longer the dotting, loving boyfriend. He looses interest in that particular chic and embarks on another hunt with another chic. On her part, the chic is confused and angry. Mostly she feels bitter at herself for having given it up so easily and with nothing to show for it. She is surprised by his sudden age and confronts him, accusing him of not loving her anymore and only wanting her body(which is true) and these accusations get to him. After all is said and done, they break up and that’s a totally different story.

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I am not for or against sex among teens, I just think things would be a lot easier if certain points and facts about it were put into perspective.

 

JOE BLACK